07年“高級英語”課文逐句翻譯（11）

　　我為什么寫作

　　Lesson 12： Why I Write

　　從很小的時候，大概五、六歲，我知道長大以后將成為一個作家。

　　From a very early age， perhaps the age of five or six， I knew that when I grew up I should be a writer.

　　從15到24歲的這段時間里，我試圖打消這個念頭，可總覺得這樣做是在戕害我的天性，認為我遲早會坐下來伏案著書。

　　Between the ages of about seventeen and twenty-four I tried to adandon this idea， but I did so with the consciousness that I was outraging my true nature and that sooner or later I should have to settle down and write books.

　　三個孩子中，我是老二。老大和老三與我相隔五歲。8歲以前，我很少見到我爸爸。由于這個以及其他一些緣故，我的性格有些孤僻。我的舉止言談逐漸變得很不討人喜歡，這使我在上學期間幾乎沒有什么朋友。

　　I was the middle child of three， but there was a gap of five years on either side， and I barely saw my father before I was eight- For this and other reasons I was somewhat lonely， and I soon developed disagreeable mannerisms which made me unpopular throughout my schooldays.

　　我像一般孤僻的孩子一樣，喜歡憑空編造各種故事，和想像的人談話。我覺得，從一開始，我的文學志向就與一種孤獨寂寞、被人冷落的感覺聯(lián)系在一起。我知道我有駕馭語言的才能和直面令人不快的現(xiàn)實的能力。這一切似乎造就了一個私人的天地，在此天地中我能挽回我在日常生活中的不得意。

　　I had the lonely child's habit of making up stories and holding conversations with imaginary persons， and I think from the very start my literary ambitions were mixed up with the feeling of being isolated and undervalued.

　　我知道我有駕馭語言的才能和直面令人不快的現(xiàn)實的能力。這一切似乎造就了一個私人的天地，在此天地中我能挽回我在日常生活中的不得意。

　　I knew that I had a facility with words and a power of facing unpleasant facts， and I felt that this created a sort of private world in which I could get my own back for my failure

　　還是一個小孩子的時候，我就總愛把自己想像成驚險傳奇中的主人公，例如羅賓漢。但不久，我的故事不再是粗糙簡單的自我欣賞了。它開始趨向描寫我的行動和我所見所聞的人和事。

　　。 . As a very small child I used to imagine that I was， say， Robin Hood， and picture myself as the hero of thrilling adventures， but quite soon my “story” ceased to be narcissistic in a crude way and became more and more a mere description of what I was doing and the things I saw.

　　一連幾分鐘，我腦子里常會有類似這樣的描述：“他推開門，走進屋，一縷黃昏的陽光，透過薄紗窗簾，斜照在桌上。桌上有一個火柴盒，半開著，在墨水瓶旁邊，他右手插在兜里，朝窗戶走去。街心處一只龜甲貓正在追逐著一片敗葉?！钡鹊?，等等。

　　For minutes at a time this kind of thing would be running through my head： “He pushed the door open and entered the room. A yellow beam of sunlight， filtering through the muslin curtains， slanted on to the table， where a matchbox， half open， lay beside the inkpot. With his right hand in his pocket he moved across to the window. Down in the street a tortoiseshell cat was chasing a dead leaf，” etc.， etc.

　　我在差不多25歲真正從事文學創(chuàng)作之前，一直保持著這種描述習慣。雖然我必須搜尋，而且也的確在尋覓恰如其分的字眼?？蛇@種描述似乎是不由自主的，是迫于一種外界的壓力。

　　This habit continued till I was about twenty-five， right through my non-literary years. Although I had to search， and did search， for the right words， I seemed to be making this descriptive effort almost against my will， under a kind of compulsion from outside.

　　我在不同時期崇仰風格各異的作家。我想，從這些“故事”一定能看出這些作家的文筆風格的痕跡。但是我記得，這些描述又總是一樣地細致入微，纖毫畢現(xiàn)。

　　The “story” must， I suppose， have reflected the styles of the various writers I admired at different ages， but so far as I remember it always had the same meticulous descriptive quality.

　　16歲那年，我突然發(fā)現(xiàn)詞語本身即詞的音響和詞的連綴就能給人以愉悅?！妒穲@》中有這樣一段詩行：

　　他負載著困難和辛勞

　　挺進著：負著困難辛勞的他——

　　When I was about sixteen I suddenly discovered the joy of mere words， i， e. the sounds and associations of words. The lines from Paradise Lost —

　　“So hee with difficulty and labour hard

　　Moved on： with difficulty and labour hee，“

　　現(xiàn)在看來這并沒有什么了不得，可當時卻使我心靈震顫。而用hee的拼寫代替he，更增加了愉悅。

　　which do not now seem to me so very wonderful， sent shivers down my backbone； and the spelling “hee” for “he” was an added pleasure.

　　至于寫景物的必要，我那時已深有領悟。如果說當時我有志著書的話，我會寫什么樣的書是顯而易見的。

　　As for the need to describe things， I knew all about it already. So it is clear what kind of books I wanted to write， in so far as I could be said to want to write books at that time.

　　我想寫大部頭的自然主義小說，以悲劇結局，充滿細致的描寫和驚人的比喻，而且不乏文才斐然的段落，字詞的使用部分要求其音響效果。

　　I wanted to write enormous naturalistic novels with unhappy endings， full of detailed descriptions and arresting similes， and also full of purple passages in which words were used partly for the sake of their sound.

　　事實上，我的第一部小說，《緬甸歲月》就屬于這一類書，那是我早已構思但30歲時才寫成的作品。

　　And in fact my first completed novel， Burmese Days， which I wrote when I was thirty but projected much earlier， is rather that kind of book.

　　我介紹這些背景情況是因為我認為要判定一個作家的寫作動機，就得對其早年的經(jīng)歷有所了解。

　　I give all this background information because I do not think one can assess a writer's motives without knowing something of his early development.

　　作家的題材總是由他所處的時代決定的，至少在我們這個動蕩不安的時代是如此。但他在提筆著文之前，總會養(yǎng)成一種在后來的創(chuàng)作中永遠不能徹底磨滅的情感傾向

　　His subject matter will be determined by the age he lives in —at least this is true in tumultuous， revolutionary ages like our own—but before he ever begins to write he will have acquired an emotional attitude from which he will never completely escape.

　　毫無疑問，作家有責任控制自己的稟性，使之不至于沉溺于那種幼稚的階段，或陷于違反常理的心境中。但如果他從早年的熏染和志趣中脫胎換骨，他就會虐殺自己的寫作熱情。

　　It is his job， no doubt， to discipline his temperament and avoid getting stuck at some immature stage， or in some perverse mood： but if he escapes from his early influences altogether， he will have killed his impulse to write.

　　除去以寫作為謀生之計不談，我認為寫作有四種動機，至少小說和散文寫作是如此。

　　Putting aside the need to earn a living， I think there are four great motives for writing， at any rate for writing prose.

　　這四種動機或多或少地存在于每個作家身上，在某一個作家身上，它們會因時代的不同和生活環(huán)境的不同而變化。它們是：

　　They exist in different degrees in every writer， and in any one writer the proportions will vary from time to time， according to the atmosphere in which he is living. They are：

　　一、純粹的自我主義。想顯示自己的聰明；想成為人們的議論中心；想身后留名；想報復那些小時候壓制、指責過自己的成年人等等。不承認這是動機，是一種強烈的動機，完全是自欺欺人。

　?。?） Sheer egoism. Desire to seem clever， to be talked about， to be remembered after death， to get your own back on grown-ups who snubbed you in childhood， etc. ， etc. It is humbug to pretend that this is not a motive， and a strong one. . .

　　二、對美的狂熱。能感覺身外世界的美，或者詞語及其妙語連珠的美。對一個讀音作用于另一個讀音的音響效果，對充實縝密的行文或一篇小說的結構，感到樂趣無窮，賞心悅目。有心與人們分享一種認為有價值、不應忽略的經(jīng)歷。

　　（2） Aesthetic enthusiasm. Perception of beauty in the external world， or， on the other hand， in words and their right arrangement. Pleasure in the impact of one sound on another， in the firmness of go